MR. CHARLES

APRIL 23, 2008. THE DAY SHE WOULD RECEIVE HER WINNERS FOR LIFE AWARD. AND EVEN THOUGH I CONGRATUALATED HER, I HAD OTHER INTENTIONS BEFORE SHE LEFT THAT MORNING. I KEPT REMEMBERING HER SAY, "THINK WITH YOUR HEART MARVIN, NOT YOUR DICK," BUT FOOLISHLY, I DECIDED TO IGNORE IT FOR ONE DAY. WHEN SHE OPENED THE DOOR AND SAID, "IM ABOUT TO LEAVE," I KNEW SHE WASN'T THINKING WHAT I WAS THINKING, BUT I WAS IGNORANT TO THAT FACT. I HAVE TO ADMIT, THIS GIRL WAS LOOKIN GOOD IN HER BROWN PIN STRIPE SLACKS, BUT MY DICK WASNTED THEM OFF. GETTING SOME WAS ALL THAT WAS ON MY MIND, AND HOW EVER I GOT IT DIDN'T MATTER. JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT MORNING MAKES ME SICK, BUT AT THE TIME I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. IT WAS FUNNY THAT I USED MY STRENGTH TO GET WHAT I WANTED. IT WAS FUNNY THAT I WAS ABLE TO CATCH HER OFF GUARD THAT QUICK. IT WAS EVEN MORE FUNNY THAT ALTHOUGH SHE FOUGHT AND TRIED AS HARD AS SHE COULD, I STILL RECEIVED MY WANT. IT WASN'T UNTIL I HEARD THAT GOONS WAS LURKIN FOR ME THAT I REALIZED I WAS THE ONLY ONE LAUGHING. IT HIT ME REAL QUICK THAT I HAD FORCED HER TO DO SOMETHING SHE DIDN'T WANT TO DO. THEN IT ALL CAME BACK. HER "STOP'S" AND "NO'S" AND "MARVIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?" BUT THE THING THAT HIT ME MOST IS REMEMBERING HER TRYING TO SCREAM, AND WHILE I PENETRATED HER AND PUT MY HAND OVER HER MOUTH, HER WHIMPERING CRIES AS I GOT WHAT I WANTED. I HAD USED MY 6'6 FRAME TO PIN HER DOWN, KNOWING HER ATTEMPTS TO GET AWAY WERE PRETTY MUCH IMPOSSIBLE. I THOUGHT WITH MY DICK FOR ONE DAY, AND I SCARRED HER FOR LIFE. GOT WHAT I WANTED, BUT SHE HATES ME WITH A PASSION. I HURT THIS GIRL TO THE FULLEST EXTENT, AND I DON'T THINK THERE IS ANYTHING I CAN DO TO MAKE IT UP TO HER. I DISRESPECTED HER IN THE WORST WAY, BUT YET SHE HAS NEVER DISRESPECTED ME IN ANY WAY. AFTER I PLEADED AND BEGGED HER TO RESPOND TO MY DEEPEST APOLOGIES, HER SILENCE BROUGHT ME TO TEARS. WAKING UP THE NEXT MORNING KNOWING THAT ILL NEVER TALK TO SASHA AGAIN MAKES ME ALMOST NOT WANT TO LIVE LIFE AT TIMES. BUT SHE HASN'T EVEN GOTTEN SLEEP SINCE THEN AND EVERYDAY SHE BLAMES HERSELF FOR MY ACTIONS. I WANT TO GET WHAT I DESERVE. I WANT MY ASS BEAT, I WANT THE POLICE CLLED, AND I WANT HER TO CUSS ME OUT. BUT INSTEAD, SHE SAYS IM NOT WORTH THE TIME. SHE EVEN SAUD THAT I COULD DO WHATEVER POSSIBLE TO TRY TO MAKE IT UP TO HER. AND ALTHOUGH THERE IS NOTHING I CAN DO TO MAKE IT UP TO HER, I KNOW THAT I AM EVEN LUCKY TO BE GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE THINGS SOMEWHAT RIGHT. THIS YOUNG WOMAN THAT I HAVE KNOWN FOR ALMOST FOUR YEARS HAD NEVER WASTED HER TIME BEING ANGRY, AND IN THE MIDST OF PEOPLE DOING WRONG, HAS ALWAYS BEEN HUMBLE AND FORGIVING. AND EVER SINCE I MER HER IN 'O5, SHE HAS ALWAYS HAD THIS THING ABOUT HER THAT MADE ME WANT TO BE BETTER EVERYDAY. SHE DOESN'T BELIEVE IT ANYMORE, BUT ONE REASON WHY I DO LOVE HER IS BECAUSE SHE MAKES ME BETTER, AND BECAUSE OF HER, I WILL BECOME BETTER WITH EVERYDAY THAT PASSES BY. I DOUBT THAT WE WILL EVER GET BACK TI BEING FRIENDS AGAIN, BUT IF GOD DECIDES TO TAKE MY LIFE, I KNOW WHY.